Tag: ascension symptoms

Just Existing

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I think that’s how I can sum up how I feel lately. I’m just existing. Not exactly finding pleasure or joy in the world, but not terribly, nor completely miserable. Just existing. Like the bobber floating on the water’s surface, not really moving, but being moved occasionally by the fisherman (Universe?) or the circumstances. Either way, it’s like a blank sheet of paper without a pen. A holding pattern with no trail to follow.

I know it’s all going to change shortly as I’m scheduled for open heart surgery in the near future. I’ve already had a few health circumstances that shook my world up and turned it upside down. I’m sure that this one will do similarly. So I guess I should be happy that I’m in this sorta steady holding pattern at the moment. But I’m not.

I don’t want to just exist here on this planet. I know from whence I come and I want to go back. While I won’t take my own life, there are times where I just don’t want to be here and I wonder if people who know me in real life understand that at all. Or even are aware of it.

I have told a few trusted spiritually ascending friends. I believe they understand and I know of one who feels similarly. But the majority just don’t get it and when/if I bring up that perhaps my time here is up, they immediately begin to tell me how much I mean to them, how I have to fight for my health and how it’s all going to be ok.

I want to scoff aloud, but I don’t because I know they are well-meaning and truly feel that way. But the bigger picture is that I lost my will to live awhile back. My heart’s been broken for awhile now. Even though I’d like to be here for my children, it feels like too much energy to exert on this broken-hearted body which barely has enough energy to get up each morning and function in the basics.

People don’t understand all that I’ve endured, nor do they get what’s really coming for me with the open heart surgery and healing process afterwards. It’s easy to throw the words around that they’ll be here, keep me in their prayers etc., but it’s me who’s fighting that battle to heal. I just don’t know if I care to do it.

Does that make me lazy? Mean? Careless? Selfish? or simply truthful?

Open Channel

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One of my favorite hymns is “Make Me A Channel of Your Peace.” The reason I’m sharing this is because of what happened to me yesterday. You know, we just had the Lion’s Gate (8/8 Portal) and as I understand it, the changes, the upgrades, the integrations are now just starting to begin. I am no exception to this. So let me tell you what is happening to me. If something similar is happening to you, please reach out. I’d like to connect with you.

I awoke at 5:42 am (again, it’s been happening a lot lately at that same time). Of course, when I add up the numbers they come to 11 which is my favorite number, so perhaps it’s not surprising. Oh there’s so much to say, I’m not quite sure where to begin.

I awoke with voices in my head. Murmurs of all different people’s voices, though I wasn’t able to identify anyone as someone I knew. I wasn’t even able to understand what they were saying, but I knew what the gist was – they were praying and requesting help. That I knew for sure.

There’s a scene in the movie Bruce Almighty where Bruce gets to be God-like and suddenly is tuned into the open channel of the billions of prayer requests at one time. Do you remember that scene? Well, that’s what it was like for me. Seriously. I know it sounds like a story to tell it, but it’s true.

My body reverberated and I had chills running up and down the length of me. I closed my eyes and I was still in my home, but I could still hear the voices in my head. It unnerved me. At first I thought I was losing my mind, but then I realized what was happening. I was tuning into the open channel. Like turning the dial on a radio, I had picked up and was receiving on that energy frequency. AMAZING!

I remember closing my eyes because it was really early in the morning and in the semi-darkness of early morn, I tried to concentrate on what I was hearing – to distinguish what was being said or in hopes that I could recognize and identify one of the voices, but I couldn’t.

So I got out of bed and began my morning routine, albeit more slowly than normal and with a bit of difficulty. When I was finished, the voices had subsided and even though focusing was more difficult than normal, I sat outside with my coffee to just be and to allow whatever wanted to come, to come. And it did. I was led to forgive and to cut cords to those in my prior life with whom are estranged. Again. Those connecting cords seem to grow back every once in awhile, so when the message comes, I listen.

I thought I was doing better as the sunshine enveloped me, warmed me and felt healing. I had a friend coming to visit for awhile and when she got there, she took one look at me and asked what was going on. Because my body was shaking visibly even though I wasn’t aware of it. Can you imagine how strange that was to hear? I put my hand out to test what she was saying and saw the tremor in my hand. Immediately, I felt the whoosh through my body as if, in that one moment of clarity, of seeing the tremor that I was’t aware of in my human body, was the catalyst for the voices to cease.

I stumbled through the words of telling her what had happened to me and how I was feeling. She too got the chills of confirmation and was able to Know even more since another friend had experienced something similar to mine. While we processed the experience together, I was given the tools to be able to tap in and also learn to put aside the open channel in order to complete human tasks needed, I felt infinitely better by the end of the day.

I have heard about Mediums who will tell those spirits who are desperately interrupting the Medium’s human life routine that the channel is not open at the moment, but that they can return later. I think this is my lesson as well.

Do you have any similar experiences?

Ascension Symptoms or Covid?

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Leading up to yesterday I’ve been experiencing strange symptoms which made no sense to me. For the last two weeks, I’ve had occasional ringing in my ears which came and went at will. Utter lethargy which came on suddenly, accompanied by the need to sleep and to sleep longer periods of time than my usual. A bit of upset tummy and loose bowels (sorry – TMI) for the last few days which came and went at will. It’s not like I ate something that didn’t agree with me, but simply my body had been taken over to release some unpleasantness. Waking up between 2-5am and remembering my dreams which were interesting to say the least. Waking one night repeatedly and each time knowing I had been in a different bed from a different time period in my life. One night waking up holding hands with someone whom I still don’t know who it was even though I asked. I had thought it were my father (who’s passed), but I never received confirmation. Believe me, if it had been my dad, he would have been happy to let me know it was him! Waking up with songs in my head and lyrics that when I looked them up, made complete sense to me because I’d asked for a sign.

However, yesterday, I suddenly began to have symptoms which were concerning. My shoulder area all the way up the back of my neck and head were constricted and tight as if they were in a vice. I was congested in my head and had a migraine headache, but in the back of my head and not in the usual place in front. I had chills that no amount of blankets could change. Not outwardly shaking chills, but deeply felt chills. Fatigued and achy throughout my body. Strangely, the aches moved from the left side under the ribcage to the right and throughout the upper body region. The upper back, neck and head area were so painful and that never let up. An occasional cough was here too, but nothing that cleared anything. My lungs felt constricted, but only the top parts, and yet I could take a deep breath and hold it for 10 seconds and release without difficulty which is good. No fever either.

I went to bed quite early and fell asleep. I remember waking up around 2am for a bit and then falling back to sleep. I don’t remember any of my dreams, nor was there a song in my head this morning.

When I awoke this morning, I was lethargic, but I pushed through the morning. Now I’m sitting here writing to you. The back of my head/neck/shoulder area is still tight, but the headache has subsided. Overall the fatigue is still here, but lessened. I still have my taste and smell, although the sense of smell is diminished, but then my nose is clogged in a strange way. I can still breathe through both nostrils but there’s a stuffiness that I haven’t had prior to now. When I blow my nose, there’s nothing in the tissue even though I feel the mucus. Sorry to be so detailed. Still without a fever and no more chills.

I have a covid test scheduled for tomorrow, but I’m thinking these are ASCENSION symptoms. Releasing all the 3D debris within the cells and body in order to ascend to 5D. Either way, I’m feeling poorly and beat up. Luckily I can relax today and take it easy.

How are you feeling? Does this sound like Ascension to you or Covid?

Ch- Ch- Ch- Changes

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We all hold the tenacity to remain stuck our limiting beliefs, thoughts and story. Breaking out of those minute details often requires a spiritual sledgehammer of sorts and a friend on whom you can rely for being honest, centered and open to your desire to follow the path. Sometimes we need someone who will hold steady as the majority of people prefer the path of least resistance when it comes to changes. Because that’s the way most of us view change. But that’s not always the case.

We’ll sooner acquiesce to change as long as it doesn’t upset us dramatically in any way. Slow moving change is often preferable because we can ease into new thinking and expand our horizons bit by bit instead of bearing one of those huge changes that feels like it wipes out all that we thought we knew and the playing field changes immediately with one solid whack. While those are not fun, sometimes they’re necessary and the Universe delivers. Believe me, I have a few Universal whacks over my lifetime. I assume that it was because I wasn’t getting the subtle messages of change so there was no other way. I was plodding through life without something to shake me up, clear out the cobwebs of outdated ways of thinking and so in one grand swoop, there was no going back to it.

I find ascension that way as well. A cha cha dance of sorts with one step up, two steps back and maybe a little twirling before we start the music again. Best done with a partner in order to help us process what is going on and to be able to mirror the observer point of view when it gets sticky. Lucky for me, I have a few partners and we all collaborate in different ways. Each brings their own special wisdom to the dance, their specialty in order to help us all to rise from 3D to 5D.

How are you doing with these changes? Are you aware of them? Dreading them? Or on the fence about embracing them? Have you started down that path of no return to 3D or are you unaware of the changes that are moving through powerfully at this time?

How I Change

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I met for coffee outside with a good friend recently. It was really cold outside, so we bundled up and sat out on the patio sipping hot coffee and actually enjoying the winter weather. We talked for a long time, each of us loving being outside with nature. The hawk made his appearance as he usually does when she comes over to visit. While I see the hawk often, he catches my eye more and more often when she’s here. I have to look up the spiritual wisdom of hawk. A post for another day.

But as it happens with us often, we began sharing the Woo Woo updates that are happening to us. Each of us had similar physical and mental symptoms as I’ve talked about in prior posts. Both of us had touches of what we worried were the beginnings of the dreaded Covid, but much to our delight and relief, we believe they were Ascension Symptoms because as fast as they came on, they were released.

Spiritual downloads are like that in a way. The physical body changes as the energies move through us. We are given that surge which can feel like extreme exhaustion or fogginess mentally as whatever updates are received. It sounds like a computer update, doesn’t it? But that’s what I am understanding. We are spiritually being updated in order to move from 3D to 5D, each in our own way and on our own divine timing.

While we were talking outside, I felt the Knowing as she was explaining a situation to me. I do remember looking at her and listening as the chatter began in my mind. The Knowing as I refer to it was talking to me at the same time that she was. When she stopped talking, I began to tell her what I heard/know. I channeled a message to her that she needed to know. When we were done and had moved beyond that part of the conversation, she told me how I change.

Remember how I said this friend told me when she knew I was getting a Knowing message? She had said I change physically, but I hadn’t asked how. Today she told me that while she was talking she observed my face go blank and my eyes almost seemed to cross. I laughed aloud. Yikes! I must seem to look very odd! But she said she recognized the look and knew it was the Knowing. And it was.

While I’m not thrilled that I must look a mess when it happens, I am grateful for the knowledge. She is very spiritual herself so it is a comfort to know that she recognizes that it’s happening to me. I am also grateful that when I tell her the message I’ve received, even when it may be difficult to deliver, that she understands it is from a higher realm.

When I am in the zone of Knowing, I feel almost above my body if that makes sense. Additionally when I tag a post as being channelled, please know that it is the Knowing that takes over the keyboard and writes through me to you. More and more I am finding that it is happening with me and I feel as if I am able to help others through this experience.

Woo Woo Sickness

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Written yesterday. Published today. Feeling much better this morning. Woo hoo!

Last night I felt awful. Suddenly I felt as if I had a fever and I kept sneezing. I was stuffed up in my head and felt as if my ears were plugged. You know, similar to a head cold. But it came on so quickly that I was completely startled by it and worried that perhaps somehow, someway, I had caught Covid.

So as I laid in bed last night, I tried to just remove the ick that was plaguing my head and lungs. I worked to release all that congestion in hopes that it was simply the ‘Woo Woo’ which is a nickname I have for the energetic vibrations that surge and seem to give us physical symptoms. The ‘Woo Woo’ is a term my friends and I use for that which we aren’t really understanding, but that we know is something good.

In other words, Woo Woo – like a big hurrah or yay or yippee! Get it?

So this morning I was really groggy. I kept hitting the snooze button on my alarm for almost 45 minutes which isn’t like me at all. When I got out of the bed, I was slow moving and just felt as if the head cold was there. I felt foggy in the brain if that makes any sense to you.

I tried to follow my morning routine, but that didn’t really go well as I felt so sluggish. Eventually I gave up and laid down on the couch and rested. This is unlike my usual routine so I knew something wasn’t right. I even cancelled a few of my appointments today because I wasn’t sure what I had.

I took my temperature and it was normal. Nothing out of the ordinary except this head congestion which was good because that made me feel as if I had contracted a normal cold and nothing more. I took a little nap and when I awoke, I felt so much better. While I’m still not at 100% tip top shape, I am relieved to feel less congested and able to breathe better.

I’ve been quiet today for the most part and I am hoping that tomorrow morning I will feel even better. Tonight I’m taking it easy again and will do my same self-healing routine when I finally get in my bed.

How are you feeling? Does any of this resonate with you?